I had a moment last night.

I was told at 11:00 AM on Friday that I had to work the entire weekend and I had to cancel my trip to Iowa to see my best friend.

Needless to say, this did not thrill me.

So I called my best friend to apologize. The conversation that followed was so hilarious that I actually wrote it down verbatim.

Clare: Hey Shawnie.
Shawn: Hey.
Clare: I am SO sorry but my boss is a giant fucking DILDO and I have to fucking work all fucking week...
Shawn: Clare.
Clare: I'm so sorr...
Shawn: CLARE. I'm in the middle of a toy store, and you're on speaker.


Whoops.