Tuesday, September 08, 2009

If you are in or around the Chicago-land area today, you have probably heard about Oprah shutting down the Magnificent Mile just to show the world that she is in fact more powerful than Jesus.

I'm glad I don't work downtown at the moment, because I'm sure it's a hot mess. However, I just landed a 3rd interview at a place that is actually located at One Magnificent Mile. If I worked there today, Oprah and I would not be getting along.

Also, I just scored having the 50 Mistakes published in a US
magazine. When I know more details, I'll share them. The good (and bad) news is that it's a new publication. I'm currently writing up some samples so they might let me write for them on an ongoing basis. Which just seems like a lot of fun. Sex in the City but with better shoes and less herpes kind of thing.

It's because of this that I had someone ask me how I would know if I've really made it with this writing thing that I've been muddling my way through.

Because she has chosen today to show what extensive power she holds over everyone on Earth, Oprah has been doing interviews on every damn radio station in the city. I caught the tail end of one interview where she stated that she would do a shot of tequila- lime no salt- because that's how you know it's a party.

Holy shit, Oprah takes her tequila the same way I do.

That's when it hit me. That's when I figured out my litmus test for success, if you will. Screw being published. Screw TV.

When I can look you in the eye and say "I've done tequila shots with Oprah", that's when I'll know I've achieved my dreams. Why? Because it's damn near impossible to even meet her. You have to be successful to get on her show, and even then she's highly selective on who she hangs out with. If I ever find myself in a position to do tequila shots with someone powerful and filthy fucking rich enough to shut down the Magnificent Mile at her whim?

I think that would be a pretty good indication.

Plus, it just sounds like something I'd do.

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

There's a difference between "become successful" and "ascend to godhood". I consider myself to be successful, but I couldn't sway millions to vote a certain way or re-route traffic in downtown Chicago. Would having that sort of power make me happy? Probably not more so than I already am. But I'm a simple guy.

Michael

Clare said...

Dude. How can that power NOT make you happy.

Id use it to destroy people I dislike.

By the time I was done Id be the god of Earth.