Sunday, April 05, 2009

Holy crap it's been awhile! I've been crazy busy over at Tame the Bear.

Not much has changed in my life really. Got laid off, only to be rehired, then laid off again. Shortly after that I spent quite a bit of time explaining to men in black suits that I was only kidding when I told that particular employer if they didn't knock it the fuck off I was going to go on a shooting rampage. Everyone knows I'm far too lazy for a shooting rampage.

Instead I was kicking around new career paths. So far I've not had much luck, but I hear with this economy that is typical.

Stripping seemed like a good plan, I mean good cash money every night? Then I realized that it required actually taking off my clothing in public. I barely get naked in the shower, and barring that no one is going to pay to see my pasty ass naked. So much for that idea.

I tried to take my diploma back to my college. I figure, I don't use the thing anyway and if I return it maybe they'll give me back some of my $100,000. And I was wrong. And no longer allowed on the premises.

I found a job that would be perfect for me. Apparently, some people will pay you thousands to look pretty and show up at parties. Unfortunately, this only applies if you're Paris Hilton. In my case, turns out the only way anyone is going to pay me to show up at a party is because I'm part of the waitstaff.

In my next life, screw this. I'm going to make sure my talents are marketable ones.

Hope you guys are all doing well and the recession hasn't kicked your asses as much as it's kicked mine. Remember, it's only temporary and things will get better. And if they don't? There's always that shooting rampage I mentioned before.

2 comments:

Bartski said...

Ah, the men in black suits...I know them well. Not a sense of humor to be found anywhere in the whole bunch of 'em.


You paid $100k for your degree? Seriously? You shoulda gone to a public school...at least then your worthless degree would have been cheaper.

j-mah said...

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